Friendship.. Why so much Drama?

This post is a very 'reflective' one. I am currently sat at home in my PJ's and dressing gown and having a little 'moment'. This isn't beauty/fashion related in the slightest so if you don't want to read me blabbering on, stop now. However, it is regarding something I think a lot of  you lovely ladies can relate too. Basically, I 'fell out' with one of my best friends a few months ago. I hate the term 'fell out' as it sounds so childish, but how else can I explain it? I'm not going to go into details but basically the fallout came about over something very silly and superficial. To be honest, I thought we would sort it out as we were such good friends. We have had tiffs in the past and always resolved them. This particular friend and I were very similar. We both loved fashion, make-up, fake tan and we always had a lot in common which is why we got along so well. However, it seemed we used to have silly little arguments over pretty much nothing. This basically came to blows and she decided to stop speaking to me full-stop. Now I'm thinking being too similar is probably a bad thing as it means our personalities sometimes clashed.

Anyway, I have been racking my brain lately thinking 'where did it all go wrong?'. This girl was a part of  my life for the past five years and although I have lots of friends, I spent a lot of my time with her. Every picture album I look in, she's there. My laptop is full of pictures from good times we had together and social networking sites are full of memories. Everywhere I look there are constant reminders. I am pretty gutted about our 'fall out' and the fact we haven't spoke in 2 and a half months. It's crazy how time can change EVERYTHING. It was only a couple of years ago we spent Christmas exchanging gifts, dancing around my bedroom to Alexandra Burke, dolling ourselves up, drinking blue WKD and going out on the town. I know life doesn't always go as you planned but I am such an emotional person and to me, this is really sad. We didn't even wish each other a 'Happy Christmas' this year and it just felt odd.

I don't really know how to feel about the whole situation if I'm honest. I find myself sitting here and thinking 'I wish I could tell her about this or that'. When I think like this, I get upset and find myself thinking WHY? On the other hand, the reason we fell out was so silly and my other friends tell me that a 'real' friend wouldn't have 'fallen out' with me over something so minor. I definitely think this is true so I then start resenting my 'ex-friend' and thinking, how could you disown me as a friend when I have been there for you for all these years? I consider myself a loyal, honest friend and if she ever needed something, I was there. So now she has 'ditched' me, I feel massively stabbed in the back. I think my honesty didn't do me any favours at times and I can sometimes speak my mind too much. It gets me in trouble but I prefer to be open with my friends than bottle things up.

Anyway, sorry to ramble. This is probably the most depressing post in the history of Blogger and I promise it won't become a regular thing. I have read a few posts on here from girls who have addressed various 'issues' they are having and the support from other bloggers has always been amazing. I write this blog about my passion for beauty but also to meet new people who I can relate to and who can relate to me. Yes, life does go on after 'falling out' with a close friend and I have got an amazing group of friends who will always be there for me but at the same time I feel like life is too short for silly fall-outs with someone I considered a close friend. I am 21 after all and would like to think the friends I have now will be my friends for life.  

Have any of you been through a similar situation with a friend? What would you do? I don't know whether I should just let it go or try to re-kindle the friendship? It certainly seems like she has no interest in being my friend, in which case she has obviously never been a real friend but I still feel I need some questions answering before I can let it go?

On a brighter note guys, me and my friend went shopping today and I finally got myself some Estee Lauder 'Doublewear' so expect a lengthy review very soon.

Lots of Love,




  1. babe, i can relate to this pretty much completely! .. i fell out with my best friend. literally known her all my life. we drifted apart and changed. got new friends. and even though when we were together it didnt ever feel any different. when i missed her 21st birthday party, i knew there was no going back. we didnt talk for probably around a year, or just over. and it was awful. at first i cut off my nose to spite my face and didnt apologise, nothing heartfelt anyway! but then as time went on i knew i needed to resolve things. thinking she'd welcome me with open arms.. she didnt. and she threw me back out into the cold! (and rightly so).. and i paid for the fact that i let her down! we talk now and again, and things are good between us, i know if i ever bump into her, it wouldnt be weird. its best to clear the air sweetie. the sooner the better. but only when you're rid of all the anger and upset. at the end of the day you'll soon realise if you want her friendship back or not. and none of the rest will matter.


    1. I'm so glad someone can relate to this dilemma I find myself in. To be honest, I don't think she cares which upsets me sooooo much. I don't particularly see what I did wrong, she just randomly didn't want to know me any more and it is really hurtful. I'm quite a stubborn person so don't feel like I should apologise for nothing but at the same time I want answers and don't want to go through life regretting not making the peace. I would at least like to be civil and on talking terms. Such a difficult situation. Thanks for your advice hun!!! Xxx.

  2. It was weird reading your post because i thought i would relate more to you, but in your story i guess i would be your ex-friend. I had a friend whom i used to call my best friend, and just like you guys we had a lot of similarities and argued a lot. I just got so tired of it one day and felt i had enough and completely cut her off. It was very sad but i just felt i was better off, since she always started the arguments. She ended up reaching out to me a couple of times but then she gave me space and about 6 months later we were back to being friends again but its never been the same. Its better this way, not being as close, we dont argue at all. All you can do is try...good luck =)

  3. loving your blog :) new follower here. hope you will stop by my blog and follow back! (I'm also doing a giveaway now :))

    xox, Maria

  4. aw... girl. that's sad. and unfortunately it has happened to me and many other of my friends as well! something about girl friendships. i don't know. i don't have many close girl friends at all, and i think it's because i've gone through one too many times of drama head games.

    but, i will say this - i think if you still have hurt feelings you need to bring it up to her... give it all you've got left in you, and see what happens. the WORST that could happen is that things remain the same right? the BEST that could happen could be that perhaps she has some things to say as well and once you both clear the air, maybe the friendship can be rekindled? even if not, at least you had the strength in you to follow your heart n' head and put it out there.

    i figure - if you really have something to say, say it! tell the truth like it is, how you feel, and don't sugar coat your words or your feelings. honesty is the best when it comes to the heart and if she can't respect what you have to say - then you officially know that you gave it your all...and it's okay to move on to better friends who deserve to have you!


  5. We agree with Jasmine.
    Who knows she may be hurt and thinking you don't care about her.
    Some one needs to 'break the ice' and feel out the other.
    If it is really over it is best to know so you can move on.
    Hope it works out so the friendship can continue.
    Love, Joan and Joann

  6. Ah I am going through this right now too. Me and my friend used to live together, and then when I moved out because of money issues, she just stopped speaking to me. We was supposed to go to Britney (haha) together and she blew me off the day before. Then we arranged a girly night out last week and again she blew me off the night before. I realised sometimes people aren't worth it. If she can't be bothered with you hun, then you shouldn't bother with her. I told her how I was feeling... and she didn't even text me back! If you tell her how you are feeling, you can move on :)

  7. I think this has happened to all of us at some point in our lives, so you're not alone! Weigh up whether you want to feel like this and lose a friend forever, or if you want to make a move towards being friends again. Sometimes a silly text, something lighthearted just getting in contact with her again could make the biggest difference, and if she doesn't reply well then at least you tried! Good luck x

  8. Hello sweetheart, I'm really sorry to hear your troubles. The loss of a friendship can feel like a death. Just like the end of a relationship.
    I recently fell out with a friend too. It had been niggling on for quite some time, like you I'm very honest. And the fact my morals were of a higher/stricter standard than hers apparently made me judgemental. Despite the fact I never opened my mouth. Cut a long story short it came to blows via text, and I decided to tell her exactly how i thought and felt. I seen her at a meal with other friends and she was civil (to the point of ignoring me). About two months after this and still having not spoken to her I see her openly slagging me off on Facebook. My response- like the comments and delete her. I don't need that childish behaviour in my life. I haven't looked back. Can't help wishing life had a Facebook 'unfriend' button!

    An older and wiser friend recently told me that you should have regular friend 'clearouts' - if they aren't adding positively to your life then don't bother. I suggest this may be a view you should take in this situation? Only you will know what to do for the best.

    Much l

  9. i know exactly what you mean! i "fell out" with one of my absolute best friends about 4 years ago now. it's really sad and i still do find myself resenting her. we were so close, inseparable, and we were like sisters -- at first, i did try to reach out and bring things back to normal but she didn't even try so i reached a point where i realized that i just had to forget about it and move on. now she writes on my facebook wall from time to time to ask me how i'm doing, i reply just to be polite but the friendship is long gone. i guess there are just some things that aren't meant to be fixed. thanks to that situation though i am now more cautious when it comes to making and keeping friends. in my opinion, if she ignores you and if she ditched you, then you're better off moving on from her so-called friendship.

    <3, Mimi
    Udderly Smooth Giveaway

  10. Thanks for the advice guys! I tried messaging her (even though I have no idea what I've done wrong) and got no response. It will be the last time I try, I'm not going to be a suck up. A real friend would realise it's silly and get in touch with me or respond to a message and she hasn't done either so I think that answers a few of my questions. She obviously isn't a real friend and never has been. Xx.

  11. I fell out with my best friend last year after she spent the night slagging off my boyfriend all night when we all went out together. I was just so disappointed in her as he had done nothing wrong. I started to realise she was quite a negative person, and quite often made negative comments about me, trying to put me down. I have never had it out with her, I didn't even at the time as we were with other friends and it would have been embarrassing, but I haven't spoke to her since and haven't really even explained why. I guess it is just one of those things I suppose you start to grow out of each other, but it does make it difficult if I know she is going to be out with my group of friends. I suppose I am just gonna have to let it go and know that I will never really be friends with her again. No point wasting your time on people who can't be nice to you. Sounds to me that you've done all you can and it is just one of those things in life.. you can't please everyone! xo

  12. I know exactly how you feel. I've fallen out with a couple different friends over the years, and I know those back and forth feelings you get. One minute you feel bad and miss them, the next minute you are reminded of something they did that was hurtful and you are mad at them again. It's never easy, or it wouldn't have ended. Hopefully you get it sorted out soon, whether that means contacting her, or moving on for good! Best of Luck xxx.

  13. i guess that everyone had 'fall outs' ... getting through this is painfull - by after some time the memories change to be something beautiful ... and you know that you spend a good time, and this person made a lot of your days ... sometimes it's just a process of 'growing up' ... but: breaking up (any kind of relationship) is almost a new start!
    regards from vienna :)

  14. Me & a friend have fallen out because I deleted her boyfriend off facebook because I didnt talk to him or know him very well for that matter. Shes being quite childish about this, she wont talk to me about it & has pretty much forgot me now. :/


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